Monday, June 25, 2012


And no that isn't a typo.  Just a little thought processing on selecting your bridal attendants.

You are giddy with excitement because you have a ring on your finger and maybe you haven't set the date yet, but you are planning the extravaganza in your head already.  The question is, who will be in it with you?

To learn the history behind maid-of-honor and bridesmaids, you can follow this link.
But the bottom line is they are family and friends of the bride who all dress alike and stand next to her on her wedding day.

Maybe you already know who you'll ask to fill that special role as your "honor attendant" or maybe you have SO many friends that you don't know how to narrow it down!  Using the reasoning that you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.

I was puzzled and not a little indignant for a bride at a bridal salon I visited some time back.  At first the gathering seemed like the usual selection of friends and family in attendance at that euphoric day when the girl first dons a white confection and appears in front of the mirrors. This young lady was 20-ish and accompanied by her mother, her maid-of-honor, two bridesmaids, and a little sister.   I don't know how long they had been at the salon, but I think they were only on the first wedding gown.  And this is where things began to go awry.

Anybody who has seen more than one episode of TLC's "Say YES to the Dress" knows that the consultants talk price point, style, fabric, etc.  There is also a special show for bridesmaids, and horror of horrors, "Bridezillas".  This was a like an outtake reel of the worst of those combined with "Jersey Shore".   The bride didn't appear overly demanding, petulant or extravagant in taste.  However, the M.o.B and M.o.H. appeared to be of the mindset that it was THEIR wedding or their job to tell the bride what wear and what not to wear.  It was unclear whether the mother and bride had discussed the wedding/dress budget beforehand but the mother made several comments along the line of "if that's what you want to wear, I'm not paying for it."  Well, that is one way to get her to wear what you pick out!

The bridesmaids had two or three hooks full of selections that they were waiting to try on, and voiced that very thought. Never did I see a salon attendant, the mother, or one of the bridesmaids work at helping the bride with all the miles of fabric, rows of buttons, or yards of lacing on any of the gowns she tried on.  As an attendant for a bride, that is your JOB DESCRIPTION.

Loyal, helpful, courteous, resourceful, polite, generous, and organized are positive characteristics to consider in choosing an honor attendant or a bridesmaid. Pushy, opinionated, loud, abrasive, argumentative, selfish, moody, unreliable . . .if she has exhibited these qualities previously (especially recently) in your acquaintance, then do yourself a  BIG favor and DON'T have her in your wedding.  Even if she is related.

The day is about you and your groom.  Don't let somebody else and their 2-cents worth of opinion ruin the enjoyment of your day.

Just something to think about.

For more ideas for planning your wedding in Alaska -

Sweet Whimsy & Company
Wedding & Event Planners
Gina Auldridge, consultant

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